"I have known her since I was 16
years old. She was my best friend ever since. Everyday we used to sit together
for class and exchange our notes the next day. I used to secretly stare at her
face and her hair, wishing she was mine. She never used to see me the same way.
And that was fine. Coz, I was with her all the time. She used to kiss
my cheeks, and her caring hugs used to make me feel nice. And soon enough I
realised, I wanted something more from this. I wanted to tell her straight from
my heart that I loved her. But then, I was just too shy, and I don't know why."
"She was a
dancer, and a beautiful one at that. She looked very pretty and graceful as
ever. Dedicated and hard working, she was the perfect one for me. She used to
write notes in her diary every day. Notes that no one could read. The lake was
our favorite place to spend time together. Everyday we used to stroll
endlessly. I loved the feeling of being with her all day. I wanted to tell her
there, that she was more than just a friend, that I loved her. But then, I was
just too shy, and I don't know why."
"Late in the
night, when my phone rang. It was her. I wondered what happened? She used to
call me and cry. She told me everything. Everything that she went through. She
was feeling low and down and was wanting to be loved. I used to console her and
did it selfishly though. I had noticed that when things went wrong, she always
shared with me and wanted me to be around. I couldn't sleep that night. And I
figured she may not have too. I should have said the words. But then, I was
just too shy, and I don't know why."
"There were
days when I used to sing and strum for her. But she never used to enjoy. Never
was she impressed. And I was fine with that. Coz, she was the best and no one
could question that. Best in her dancing, best in singing, best in her acads. I
was so impressed. Slowly but surely, years passed by. I had to leave the city
for my job. I always wanted to keep her close. A tight hug was all that I could
do before she could leave. I wanted to keep her near, but I couldn't tell her.
And soon after she disappeared. As I had always imagined, she looked very
pretty in her wedding dress. I remained seated near the aisles."
"I used to
meet her. We used to talk, share our experiences with each other. I felt I
should tell her that I loved her despite my fear. But it was too awkward to
express now that she was away. Distance kept us busy in our own lives. But we
remained friends always. She had two kids. I loved playing with them and buying
them gifts. Her husband was successful, smart and kept her happy. I
remained the struggling writer I always was, alone, unpleasant."
"After several
years, I grew old. Yet alone with heart of a stone. And then one day, my phone
rang. It was her husband. I got to know that the girl I had loved for 60 years
was no more. She died at 69. Memories of the past came flashing to my eyes, as
I paid my last respect to the love of my life. My feelings still hidden to me,
her husband handed me the diary in which she used to write everyday. With a
heavy heart I started reading."
"He has been
my best friend, ever since we were 16. I stared at him everyday wishing he was
mine. I wanted to tell him that, but I didn't know what he feels about me. I
feared for our friendship, I feared it would all end. I held back my feelings,
only hoping that he would read my signs. I notice him staring at me sometimes,
but I don't know why he looks away the next moment. I don't know if he loves me
or wants things to remain the same way. I am sure if he feels the same, he will
find it in him to confess his love and convey. But then, I can't keep waiting
for long. Things need to move. I wish he tells me now. He seems too shy. Too
shy, and I don't know why."
------
"But that is
not how the story ends. Coz am not shy anymore."
I looked at her. As
I finished reading my story. She looked at me with awe, tears rolling down her
eyes and a gentle smile. I could notice the diary in her hand. It was held
tight. The moment said it all. Everyone was applauding my story at the open mic
story-narration gathering at the college cafe. But that didn't matter to
me. I could hear the claps as she came towards me and gave me the most assuring
hug I have ever got from her.
I couldn't stop my
tears. Tears of joy.
PS: With all due
credit to 'Too Shy' - A Student Short Film by Ryan Hutchins (Hutchbaby
Productions).
